Balancing blunt numbers

Connect the Dots

Already light with cheap beer, I was entitled to one free drink (albeit with an $8 cover charge) at Starry Plough as one of that night’s randomly chosen poetry slam judges. Every week, the unsuspecting Irish pub hosts the Berkeley Poetry Slam group, composed of local individuals drunk with the
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Moving beyond vanilla

Sex on Monday

Every time I go out on a date with someone, I want to skip past the awkward small talk getting-to-know-you phase, and just break out a survey. It would cover the basics of “What are you looking for right now: Casual sex? Commitment?” But it would also cover the things
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The loneliest decision

With my roommate gone for the past three days, I spent each night alone in my apartment, watching a documentary on suicide called “The Bridge.” Why would I do such a thing? I have no idea. The documentary focuses on the Golden Gate Bridge as the number one suicide spot
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Assigning sexual tension

Connect the Dots

I think girls are hot. Because I think so, a classmate who I unknowingly led in the wrong direction suggested that I might be sexually confused, or “trapped in the closet.” Walking through campus on a sunny day celebrated by short skirts and ethereal blouses, my obnoxiously masculine utterances are
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Have fun with learning

Sex on Tuesday

The first time someone asked me if I had orgasmed, my response was “I … don’t know.” This was not the answer that he was looking for, and a period of stroking the man-ego commenced. I found that response to my uncertainty about orgasm far more annoying than the lack
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This is a good season

The Way I See It

If it were up to me, school would be optional centers of joyous learning where tears of happiness are spilt over intellectual conversations, stimulating reading and a lot of hugs. Very little is up to me, sadly. Instead, school has become, for many students including myself, a rectangular plot of
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Choosing the Right Condom Size

Sex on Tuesday

Even though size does(n’t) matter, there are times when you need to know what you are working with.  Buying condoms is one of those times. While the video of a condom being stretched over someone’s head is impressive, and does rather invalidate the statement “I’m too big for condoms,” it
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Shopping socialization

Get on the fucking sidewalk,” I heard as I made a wide right turn past a house party near Willard Park. Though I failed to follow the bro’s solid advice, he cheered me on as he yelled, “Fixies for life!” twice as if I didn’t hear him the first time.
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Why size does(n’t) matter

Sex on Monday

While the sentiment of “I’ve never measured my cock, I figure I couldn’t do anything about it anyway” is certainly better than an unreasonable obsession with size, I am more of a fan of know what you’ve got, and work it. Penis size matters, but probably not in the way
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Resovling to conflict

The Way I See It

I’ve never been fond of conflict. I mean, who is, right? Nobody likes conflict; it’s faux pas to desire anything other than peace. And as “Miss Congeniality” dictates, “world peace” is a required goal for all members of society. But while nobody enjoys an atmosphere of discord, I always took
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