Sexually active

Sex on Tuesday

I still hear that nasty homophobic inner voice from time to time, but I can ignore it much better now. I can make the first move confidently and it’s not as scary as I once thought — especially because I know someone’s probably going to end up coming that night, as long as I actually start the conversation.
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Out, loud and vocal

Sex on Tuesday

I used to hate how women sounded in porn — breathy, overly enthusiastic, shrill, annoying. But I’ve realized that my actual issue with their eager exclamations was that they seemed forced and fake.
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Recognizing sex as a coping mechanism

Sex on Tuesday

It wasn’t until I started journaling and addressing the root of my pain that I realized how my trauma had impacted my sex life. Being a survivor of violence has meant unlearning my dangerous coping mechanisms and unpacking my unhealthy relationship to sex.
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Tell him, boy, bi

Sex on Tuesday

Since then, I’ve been learning and relearning how to fully embrace my sexuality. I thought that the ending of my relationship would be the last time my body and sexuality were directly policed — but I was wrong. I am still constantly being regulated and policed by society’s toxic expectations of what it means to be a bisexual woman of color.
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Woman smiles with her arms crossed in front of her.

Dick flicks for chicks

Sex on Tuesday

This column was originally published in the Aug. 31, 2010 issue of The Daily Californian. It’s either a great misconception that women don’t watch and enjoy porn, or I just happen to know the only girls in existence who do. I’m not saying we watch it all the time to
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All you can eat buffet

Sex on Tuesday

For whatever reason, the concept that a man should be pleased orally, while a woman should not necessarily be similarly pleased has become ingrained into contemporary sexual practice. Not only is it unfair at face value, but it’s also unjust when thinking about it from a pleasure standpoint.
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Light the lights

Sex on Tuesday

Whatever your reasoning may be, if you’ve never had sex with the lights on, you really ought to give it a try. I’m sure for many of you this isn’t uncharted terrain — some of you probably even do it on a regular basis.
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When naughty is nice

Sex on Tuesday

I think the best gifts are things you know the recipient will love but that they would never go out and buy for themselves. For a lot of people, sex toys fit the bill.
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Don’t do shit

Sex on Tuesday

I’m giving someone head, and they start laughing. They ask why I don’t suck their dick more often, even though I always make them cum and sex ends when they are finished. They ask as if I don’t care about their pleasure. I swear this person doesn’t even know where
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